Lulu's 12 steps to enlightenment

Lulu has announced that Step five of her path to enlightenment is – are you ready for it? – get over your own self. Get over your own self!

“Don’t be a victim of your past,” she said. “Like Michael Jackson. Look what happened to him. “Wake up, man!” she said. “Live life!”

Those of you following Lulu’s path to enlightenment may have noticed that we have skipped over steps 3 and 4. Lulu’s revelations are not necessarily coming in order, you see. Stay tuned for step 4.

And I am sorry to report that Step 3 had to be glossed over, Chicklets, because not all spiritual leaps forward are family friendly.

Those of you following Lulu’s recently-announced 12 Steps to Enlightenment program will be pleased to learn that she has settled on step 2.

Talking like Yoda. Yes, Yoda.

Chicklets, can you hear it? “Out of money, Lulu is. Condo sapped life savings, it did. Repay RSPs, Lulu must.”

I cannot help put notice that steps 1 and 2 both relate to language. She’s a fancy talker, that Lulu.

Lulu has announced that she is on a twelve step program. Step 1 is to replace the F-word, when used as an adjective, with the wood “bloody.” Step 12 is Buddhism. Steps 2-11 she has not yet filled in. Stay tuned.